Where am i leading to?

Well...
How am i gonna start...
Though everything seems going fine now...
But i'm still feeling very troubled...
Maybe i am not confident for myself....
I'm very afraid of losing another person again....
I dare not do anything...
Do anything to improve our situation to a better stage...
I'm afraid i might worsen the situation...
I do not know what can i do...
I do not know what am i supposed to do...
Maybe im always lost...
Always...
What am i...
I don't know...
Hiding myself...
Again and again...
Is this...
A kinda life i am suppose to lead...
I guess so...
The sky was beautiful...
The sea was nice...
THe sea waves were peaceful...
But...
This were in the past...
Past...