对不起，我爱你

....

害怕

忘
我没有很努力要自己去遗忘
那些和日记一起收藏的过往
孤单在思绪之中变得很漫长
想
我没有很刻意让自己不去想
那些和照片静止的模样
我学着坚强
坚强到不用学着不想
学着遗忘
还是害怕夜深人静时总想起你
还是害怕的不经意听见你的消息
然而当爱已经沉淀得太清晰
当拥有已经是失去
就勇敢的放弃
还是害怕一个人时就很难忘记
还是害怕突然宁愿当初没有决定
然而当爱最后的出口是分离
我会这么相信
走下去
还是害怕夜深人静时总想起你
还是害怕的不经意听见你的消息
然而当爱已经沉淀得太清晰
当拥有已经是失去
就勇敢的放弃
还是害怕一个人时就很难忘记
还是害怕突然宁愿当初没有决定
然而当爱最后的出口是分离
我会这么相信
走下去
忘
我没有很努力要自己去遗忘
遗忘

Thousand apologies.

Through my eyes
I felt the lights dimmed
Through my ears
I see the voices masked behind walls
Through my skin
I hear the temperature whisky away
As though time fell into a dark hole
Just as the star overwhelmed by the overcrowding darkness
Just as my heart swallowed itself

Like a major chord descending its steps to the minor
Like a flight of stairs when you missed one
Like a humanoid so perfect but without a soul

I am sorry I masked the voices behind walls
I am sorry I have overwhelmed the stars with darkness
I am sorry I have made you missed a step from the stairs

Though you have already forgiven
It is still in me to say this to you

I'm sorry.

Clean White Love

I left the keys in the car
I left the door ajar
I didn't want to be alone

These are the days and the nights
of these sweet humbling heights
and I know it used to be home

Whisk me away
i'll be yours for a day
in heavenly fields which we roam

A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're too clean white love
What are you doing?
What you doing, what ya doing to me?
What are you doing to my head?

A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're too clean white love.
I give my heart on the evening of June 25th
Oh, everybody's looking for a fix

Hey...

Sell me a sign
I'll cut the telephone line
Just to keep the quotations alive

Oh you're bleeding me dry
but the feeling is blind
and I know you're looking divine.

Sell me it straight
Oh, it might be too late
Keep on breaking the rules

Oh...
A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
What are you doing?
What you doing, what ya doing to me?
What are you doing to my head?

A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're too clean white love.
I give my heart on the evening of June 25th
Oh, everybody's looking for a fix

Oh.... Oh a oh....

And this love is diseased
there's a cure
I need that medicine
to get to the core

Remember this place
It's left to the fates
but it's kind to be cruel

Oh...
A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
What are you doing?
What you doing, what ya doing to me?
What are you doing to my head?

A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're too clean white love.
What are you doing?
What you doing, what ya doing to me?
What are you doing to my head?

A woah ah oh you're my clean white love
A woah ah oh you're too clean white love.
What are you doing?
What you doing, what ya doing to me?
What are you doing to my head?

In my heart on the evening of June 25th
Oh, everybody's looking for a fix

Ohhh... ah ohhh......

Here I Am

When I Need You

For Good

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you...

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend...

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you


Because I knew you


I have been changed for good


And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for


But then, I guess we know
There's blame to share


And none of it seems to matter anymore


Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood


Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood


Who can say if I've been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better


And because I knew you...


Because I knew you...


Because I knew you...
I have been changed for good...

Rubber Band

Sometimes
I feel that we are so different
Like we belong to two different worlds....

Where

On this half lit day
With your crown beneath your wing
Every word just echoes
And the empty world sings

Where have you gone my feather light heart?
I never imagined I could leave.

In the glistening
Of the lost and open sky
Tiny piece of you sits
Simple wish waits for reply

Where have you gone my feather light heart?
You mustn't forget what love can see.

Eyes on Me

My last night here for you
Same old songs, just once more
My last night here with you
Maybe yes, maybe no
I kind of liked it your way
How you shyly placed your eyes on me

Oh, did you ever know?
That I had mine on you

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you're never hurt
As if you're never down
Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then
I will know that you are no dreamer

So let me come to you
Close as I want to be
Close enough for me
To feel your heart beating fast
And stay there as I whisper

How I loved your peaceful eyes on me
did you ever know
That I had mine on you

Darling, so share with me
Your love if you have enough
Your tears if your're holding back
Or pain if that's what it is
How can I let you know
I'm more than the looks and the voice
Just reach me out then
You will know that you're not dreaming

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you're never hurt
As if you're never down
Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then
I will know that you are no dreamer.

Cold Turkey Effect

Don't think you're going to see it
But just needed to voice out
I am missing you like crazy
I am zoning out every other time thinking about you
I am possessed by the memories we had together
Every single minute kills
The insanity overwhelming
Sanity taking control
My mind's clogged up
Just like an addict undergoing cold turkey
That is how bad it is


Day 1
Signing out,

Still breathing.

Unknown

I See You

I see you
Walking through a dream
I see you
My light in darkness breathing hope of new life
Now I live through you and you through me
Enchanting
I pray in my heart that this dream never ends
I see me through your eyes
Living through life flying high
Your life shines the way into paradise
So I offer my life as a sacrifice
I live through your love
You teach me how to see
All that’s beautiful
My senses touch your word I never pictured
Now I give my hope to you
I surrender
I pray in my heart that this world never ends
I see me through your eyes
Living through life flying high
Your love shines the way into paradise
So I offer my life
I offer my love, for you
When my heart was never open
And my spirit never free
To the world that you have shown me
But my eyes could not division
All the colours of love and of life
Evermore

Complaint letter dedicated to the beloved DR. CHRISTOPHER CHONG of Singhealth Polyclinic...AWESOME.

It is with utmost regret that I have had to resort to such a measure to bring to light the unprofessional conduct of one of your doctors, Christopher Chong (Room 14, Pasir Ris Polyclinic).

I have tolerated his uncouth behaviour everytime I was attended to by him but I have no choice but to send this letter of complaint after the last visit.

I have had to endure excruciating pain in my left heel region to make the trip down to the polyclinic for medication as well as medical leave. However, when I was attended to by Dr Chong, I was made to seem like a fraud and was incredibly appalled at his dismissive attitude towards my injury. The moment I mentioned by complaint of pain in my left heel, he dismissed it, saying, "You wouldn't have made it to the clinic if it was THAT painful."

This encounter with his bitchy and dismissive attitude was certainly not an isolated incident as previous encounters with him were largely similar.

I refrained from retorting as I was already in so much pain and had no energy to deal with such nonsense.

If I had my way, I would have mentioned the very glaring flaw he had which made me doubt his professionalism in his job as a doctor. It would not have taken a genius to figure out that he wasn't exactly adhering to HPB's guidelines for healthy BMI.

I hope that your good company would put more effort into screening the types of doctors you place in your polyclinics as they are, after all, the first echelon of the medical institutional hierarchy. Having such uncouth and unservice-oriented staff would taint your otherwise good reputation as a healthcare provider.

I look forward to your favourable response.

Warmest regards,
Raymond Wong.

"When will you be home?" she asks
As we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
And yet she says to me

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and
SIlver-painted hair
Daddy called one evening saying
"We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

可惜不是你

這一刻　突然覺得好熟悉
像昨天　今天同時在放映
我這句語氣　原來好像你
不就是我們愛過的證據

差一點　騙了自己騙了你
愛與被愛不一定成正比
我知道被疼是一種運氣
但我無法完全交出自己

努力為你改變
卻變不了　預留的伏線
以為在你身邊　那也算永遠

彷彿還是昨天
可是昨天　己非常遙遠
但閉上我雙眼　我還看得見

可惜不是你　陪我到最後
曾一起走　卻走失那路口
感謝那是你　牽過我的手
還能感受那溫柔

那一段　我們曾心貼著心
我想我更有權利關心你
可能你　已走進別人風景
多希望　也有　星光的投影

Requiem Aeternam

Grant them eternal rest, O Lord,

And may light eternal shine upon them.

It is fitting that a hymn should be raised unto Thee in Sion

And a vow paid to Thee in Jerusalem:

Give ear to my prayer, O Lord,

Unto Thee all flesh shall come at last.

Lord, have mercy!

Christ, have mercy!

Lord, have mercy!

Two Face.

Water
Always so weak
So fragile
Shows no masculinity
It sews through obstacles
Manipulating itself against danger
Puts off fire
Creates a storm that can kill everything

Such beautiful element
So elegant
Yet so deadly
So heartless

Love her
Hate him.

Dedication to myself

I am struggling
But no one knows
People think I am always joyous
But I am not
I hate being happy when I am not
I hate cheering people up
Being there for them
Letting them know
I am there for them
When I am sad and unstable myself
No one knows how I feel
I chose to be happy for the obvious
Doesn't mean I am happy